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What encouragement can you offer
to those of us who are single parents? Each day seems more
difficult than the one before it. Can you help plead our case to
those who don’t understand what we’re facing?
In
my view, single parents have the toughest job in the universe! Hercules,
himself, would tremble at the range of responsibilities people like
you must handle every day. It’s difficult enough for two parents
with a solid marriage and stable finances to satisfy the demands
of parenting. For a single mother or father to do that task excellently
over a period of years is evidence of heroism.
The
greatest problem faced by single parents, especially young mothers
like yourself, is the overwhelming amount of work to be done. Earning
a living, fixing meals, caring for kids, helping with homework,
cleaning house, paying bills, repairing the car, handling insurance,
doing the banking, the income tax, etc., can require 12 hours a
day or more. She must continue that schedule seven days a week all
year long. Some have no support from family or anyone else. It’s
enough to exhaust the strongest and healthiest woman. And where
does she find time and energy to meet her social and emotional needs
— and how does she develop the friendships on which that part
of her life depends? This job is no easier for most fathers who
may find themselves trying to comb their daughter’s hair and
explain menstruation to their preteen girls.
There
is only one answer to the pressures single parents face. It is for
the rest of us to give them a helping hand. They need highly practical
assistance, including the friendship of two-parent families who
will take their children on occasion to free up some time. Single
moms need the help of young men who will play catch with their boys
and take them to the school soccer game. They need men who will
fix the brakes on the Chevy and patch the leaky roof. They need
an extended family of believers to care for them, lift them up and
remind them of their priorities. Perhaps most important, single
parents need to know that someone cares about them and is willing
to help share their burden.
Thankfully,
churches today are becoming more sensitive to the needs of single
parents. More congregations are offering programs and ministries
geared to the unique concerns of those with special needs. I’d
advise every single parent to find such a church or fellowship group
and make himself and herself at home there. Fellowship and support
can be the key to survival.
Excerpted
from books written by Dr. James Dobson of Focus on the Family and
published by Tyndale House.
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