The Basics On Adoption

Have you ever walked away from a conversation thinking to your-self, “I shouldn’t have had to have that conversation”? I mean, some things should just be basic. And some things for certain professions should be even more clear-cut and basic.

I recently had a conversation like this with a pastor. I guess I am so spoiled by the pastors at my church and the pastors that I have known through my work, that it really took me by surprise when I stumbled into a conversation with a pastor who was the main speaker at a conference I recently attended. During his off-stage time we were sitting chatting and embryo adoption came up - there are over 400,000 unwanted frozen embryos held in suspense between our debate over research and loving couples to adopt them. Their tiny lives hang in the balance.

The pastor said, “Hmm, but what about the trauma the child goes through when it finds out how it came to be?”

I said, “There really isn’t any difference in adoption vs. embryo adoption issues for the children, adoptive parents, or birth/genetic parents.”

Pastor: “Yes, and they are all traumatized by adoption.”

Dana: “I’m really surprised to hear you say that, especially as a pastor. It’s only through adoption that we are welcomed into God’s family.”

Pastor: “Yes, spiritually, I guess. But, I know my heritage traced back generations — I could tell you about every generation that settled in America and back to the old country — and knowing where I came from is who I am.”

Dana: “Wait a minute. Is your identity in genetics or is our identity in Christ?”

Pastor: “Well, genealogy is important to God. He spent a great deal of time in the Bible listing our genealogies.”

Dana: “But, that was for the purpose of pointing to Christ and completing prophecy. Again, pointing to our identity in Christ.”

Pastor: “You have to admit, if a child is raised in a Christian home, it’s better for them so they can go to heaven?”

Dana: “Being raised in a Christian home does not save you. Nothing we do can add to or take away from Christ dying on the cross for our salvation. Yes, being raised in a Christian home might give you better life here on earth in how we live, and the child might have more opportunities to hear and learn about Christ, but any child anywhere can become saved no matter what home they live in.”

Pastor: “But, God designed it to be one man and one woman that come together to have children and raise a family. In an ideal world we wouldn’t have all these other confusions.”

Dana: “Well, on that we agree. In an ideal world that’s how it would be, just as He designed. But, we haven’t lived in the ideal world since the original sin! In an ideal world, we agree.”

And the pastor had to return to the conference. I came away wondering what happens in that man’s church? These concepts should be basic — especially in the profession of a pastor.

o

Dana Serrano Chisholm can be reached at DanaChisholm@cox.net.